April 1st - Opening Day

Well, it’s Opening Day 2011. “Opening Day” of what? Are you kidding me? Baseball, of course!

My sister is reading this book called Baseball Eccentrics by Bill "Spaceman" Lee. I’m from Boston, so I was always a fan of the “Spaceman,” who pitched for the Boston Red Sox in the 1970s. When I think of Bill Lee, I can’t help but think of his Eephus pitch, which sometimes worked and… Well, sometimes…

Bill was once pitching against the Chicago White Sox, when it started to rain. In fact, it was a torrential rain, and Bill decided that his Eephus pitch might be just the ticket under those conditions.

Eephus pitch? What the heck is an Eephus pitch? The Eephus pitch is a really slow (50mph), high-arching pitch that seems to fall out of the sky. It catches major league hitters off-guard, because they’re used to pitches that curve very little and typically rip at them at about 90mph.

On this day in Chicago, the Spaceman decided that his Eephus would not only be unexpected, but also it would be drop out of the sky, just like that rain. Near the end of the game, Lee threw 14 straight Eephus pitches. Turns out that in the process he managed to piss off both the manager of the White Sox, Chuck Tanner, and also his own manager, Eddie Kasko. Thinking that Lee should be doing a better job of mixing up his pitches, Kasko stepped up to the top of the Red Sox dugout and yelled out, "You can't throw that many (of the same pitches) all in a row?” At the same time, Tanner, the White Sox manager, stepped to the top of the White Sox dugout and called out, "You son of a bitch, quit showing up my hitters!”

Only Bill Lee could have pissed off both the manager of the opposing team, as well as HIS OWN MANAGER at the same time.

But it had worked. Lee got a standing ovation at the end of a complete game shutout against the White Sox, in which he threw nothing but his slow Eephus pitch over the last three innings.

The "Eephus" pitch was invented by Rip Sewell when playing for the Pittsburgh Pirates in the 1940s. Nobody knows where the term “Eephus” comes from, but it sure is suspicious that the Hebrew word for “nothing” is "efes." According to Pittsburgh manager, Frankie Frisch, the pitch was named by outfielder Maurice Van Robays, who said, "Eephus ain't nothin’, and that's a nothin pitch.”

But the Eephus pitch was not always kind to Bill Lee. In the 1975 World Series, the Boston Red Sox were opposed by the Cinncinati Reds. It remains one of the most exciting World Series ever played. The series was tied three games to three, when Bill Lee started the 7th game for the Red Sox. The Spaceman was looking good over the first five innings, as he was pitching a shutout and the Red Sox were ahead 3-0, when he faced the Reds slugger Tony Perez. Lee had faced Perez two times previously and had struck him out both times on an Eephus pitch. But in the sixth inning, Lee went to the well one too many times; Perez slammed an 0-2 Eephus pitch over the left field wall for a two-run homer, which started the Reds’ comeback. Cincinnati eventually won that 7th game 4-3, and the Reds, and not Bill Lee’s Red Sox, won the 1975 World Series.

To paraphrase one great philosopher: “Live by the Eephus pitch, die by the Eephus pitch.”

Well, it’s Opening Day 2011, so why am I writing about an old, has-been like Bill Lee? Well, first, I’m reading this book that one of younger sisters Edie showed me. (Remember?) But also… Bill Lee threw this Eephus pitch in a game with a torrential rainstorm. You see, my other sister doesn’t believe in climate change which is starting to cause dramatic increases in precipitation and… But that’ll have to wait for another blog.